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她乐园

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没来由地心慌,感觉心跳又快又重,震得整个人都在抖。有时候睡觉睡着睡着会突然惊醒,也是心跳特别快,手心出汗。我想了想,是读高三的时候有过类似症状,最近的诱因大概是公司裁员降薪,我也被迫转岗,新工作也很不适合我,总之就是这份工作干不下去,又很怕失业,我又是没啥技能的商科生,内向还社恐,公司人际关系也是一言难尽。最近特别想跟着表姐去摆摊,她刚生了小孩没有工作,但她以前开店摆摊,挣不多但生活费是足够,我觉得她是个很有生命力的人,和她在一起很多生存焦虑就会减轻很多。乱七八糟讲了这么多,我也不知道我该怎么办,或许在这里忍几年就好了,也或许要不了多久就被裁了。还是头疼,撕手皮,心慌,太阳穴一下一下地跳。

——written by momo

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